Spring.

In case some of you out there read this blog in places where it would be impossible, or at least socially unacceptable, to listen to the podfist, I'll post the transcript below. Just know, however, that you really ought to find some way of listening to the podfist, because it's a lot better to hear than to read. Trust me.

Transcript:

Here’s something else that makes me mad: SPRING. Everything about it drives me up the freaking wall. Birds chirping, bees buzzing, flowers blooming, and everything’s just so WARM. You walk outside and people are walking around, smiling, dancing and holding hands and saying, “Aren’t you just so glad that it’s SPRING?!?!?” NO I AM NOT JUST SO GLAD THAT IT’S SPRING. I like it cold, I like it gray, and I like it when people like you are shivering and MISERABLE. I don’t want to see your happy shining face. I don’t want to hear you telling me how glad you are to be alive and what a wonderful world it is. I don’t want to see your butterflies and robins and furry little rodents all over my lawn. GO AWAY AND TAKE YOUR WRETCHED SEASON WITH YOU BEFORE I VOMIT ALL OVER YOUR HIDEOUS FACE.

(direct link to podfist)

Upstairs Neighbors.

I spent this morning figuring out how to do podcasts, and I'm pleased to say that you can now listen to my rants against humanity instead of merely reading them. They'll all be pretty short, so you won't have to spend forever downloading them, but I think they're worth listening to. You can listen to today's rant (just over two minutes) by clicking on the title of this post, or by going to http://media.switchpod.com//users/notjames116/podfist1.mp3. Enjoy!

Blogfisting.

Like most people, there are a lot of things that bother me. And like most people, I'm too well-mannered to say anything about them.

UNTIL NOW.

I'm not actually an angry person, but I've decided to post irrational rants about whatever I feel like here from time to time. I'm not trying to vent anger, or make other people upset, but rather just channel my inner curmudgeon. I may even drink a little prune juice to make me angrier and give my posts a little more edge.

Blogging with a fist, that's what I say.

Today's rant: MISUSE OF THE SHARE FEATURE ON GOOGLE READER. This is a problem, people. Sharing articles you think are interesting is okay. Sharing every article on a blog for weeks? Not acceptable. There's a reason I'm not already reading the blog regularly. Don't change that decision without my consent.

But couldn't I just block egregious offenders, you ask? Absolutely! I know lots of people that have already lost their sharing privileges with me. I'm sure many more will lose those privileges in the future until the only articles I'm reading are the ones I picked for myself. (Hey, that's not such a bad idea, actually.) I'm just angry that not everyone already conforms to my personal style and I'm going to yell here in my corner of the internet until everyone falls in line with me. (Slight pause for a prune juice break.)

There, doesn't everyone feel better? Tune in tomorrow for more things that make me angry!